Tales from the North Side

How a Cub fan is spending his winter...

Northwest Herald:

Later, in line at Wrigleyville Sports at Addison and Sheffield on the North Side, talk centered on the Cubs outfield situation. This was said by a man checking out a Juan Pierre jersey that was on sale:

Customer: Juan Pierre’s not on the Cubs anymore?

Clerk: (Hopefully mentally rolling his eyes). No, he signed with the Dodgers a few weeks ago.

Customer: Who’s No. 9 now? Maybe they don’t have a No. 9. OK, I have to think about this.

A minute or two passes.

Customer: OK, I’ll take it. But the one without the name on the back.

Just goes to show that dopey thinking knows no latitude.